No Justice

I had to go in Thursday for jury duty and it was brief but disappointing. I didn't get picked to be on the jury.

I showed up at the courthouse at around 9:30 in the morning. I didn't bring in my cell phone because I can never seem to remember to turn it off when I have to. Plus I had to go through a metal detector, which I hate, so I tried to carry as few things as possible. A couple of guys from the sheriff's office were at the gate. One was trying as hard as possible to put across that he was a bad ass despite the fact that a light breeze probably would have sent him hurtling into the ionosphere. He was the one saying, "Empty your pockets," before motioning everyone through the detector with an unimpressed nod and a "come get some" hand wave. He seemed crushed that the hand-held detector failed to reveal any hidden weapons that would have turned his morning into something more dramatic.

The second officer was somewhat refreshing. He was younger; didn't seem at all emboldened by his badge and gun. Sitting behind a monitor, watching as bags were x-rayed, he could have been waiting to sell you a t-shirt or a pack of gum. This was obviously just his job and not the realization of any life-long, egomaniacal power fantasy.

The waiting room for the jurors wasn't bad, though I was too scared to try their coffee. My heart sank a bit when I saw a stack of board games in the corner. I sincerely hoped that I wouldn't be there so long that I'd resort to playing a board game with a group of strangers. We only had to wait about a half hour before being led through the halls like a kindergarten class into the brownest room imaginable. Everything was made of wood. The walls, floors, doors, benches, chairs, tables, gates, and barriers were all wood. The only things that didn't seem to be wooden were the asbestoses ceiling and American flag. The messiness of the court reporter's desk was the only other striking feature the place had to offer.

The proceedings were unspectacular. His Honor arrived so we all stood up, a wonderful custom bound to keep all judges humble. The jurors were welcomed and introduced to the plaintiff and defendant in what turned out to be a civil case. This was a bit of a surprise. So many of these cases end up decided in the People's Court and on Judge Joe Brown, that it had slipped my mind that these matters could involve a jury. The case was that of Some Dame V. Mercedes-Benz USA. The former was suing the latter under New Jersey's lemon law. Apparently her car reeked of citrus or something.

The court reporter called out seven names from the roughly 30 jurors who had been called in. The judge went on to ask them about their jobs, hobbies, and feelings about whether too many frivolous law suits are filed in this country (yes). All seven of these folks seemed to fit the bill as competent jurors so the rest of us were cut loose.

All in all, I don't feel like I got the full experience. Hopefully in the future I will be called upon again and this time I will be able to walk away having actually participated in the system. I sort of feel like I got left out in kickball, a slight feeling of rejection without it being a huge loss.